Online dating has complicated the early stages of the dating experience. As a Seattle harassment defense attorney, I’ve seen how online dating misunderstandings can spiral into serious legal trouble. Here’s what you need to know about harassment laws in Washington—and how to protect yourself.
What Counts as Harassment Under Washington Law?
In Washington, harassment is more than just unwanted communication—it’s about intent, repetition, and whether the other person felt threatened or intimidated. Under RCW 9A.46.020, criminal harassment can involve:
- Repeated unwanted contact (texts, calls, social media messages)
- Threatening language (even if you didn’t mean it seriously)
- Behavior that causes fear or distress
In the context of online dating, this can happen in several ways:
- Following up too many times after a date with no response
- Expressing anger or frustration when someone ghosts you
- Joking or sarcastic messages that are misinterpreted as threats
- Showing up unexpectedly at their workplace or home after they stop responding
It’s important to understand that harassment charges don’t always require an explicit threat. If the other person feels scared or unsafe—even if that wasn’t your intent—it can still lead to legal trouble.
Common Defenses in Online Dating Harassment Cases
If you’re facing harassment charges after an online date, don’t panic. Washington’s harassment laws require specific elements to be met for a conviction. A skilled defense attorney will take a look at your case and decide how to best approach your defense. Here are some common legal defenses:
Lack of Criminal Intent
Harassment requires proof that you knowingly and intentionally acted in a way that could reasonably be perceived as a threat. If there was no intent to harass or threaten, the prosecution may not have a case.
Isolated or Non-Threatening Communication
Harassment typically involves a pattern of repeated or threatening conduct. A one-time message or polite follow-up is unlikely to meet the legal standard unless it contains a credible threat of harm.
No True Threat or Reasonable Fear
The prosecution must prove that the alleged victim had a legitimate reason to fear harm based on your actions. If there were no explicit threats, and no reasonable person would feel threatened by your actions, you may have access to this defense.
Protected Speech
Washington courts recognize that not all unwelcome communication is criminal. If the messages were part of a normal disagreement or contained opinions rather than threats, they may be protected under the First Amendment. However, true threats or repeated unwanted contact may not fall under this protection.
False Accusations or Misinterpretations
These types of complaints often come from simple miscommunication or even retaliation. In these situations, your attorney can challenge the credibility of the claim.
What to Do If You’re Accused of Harassment
Being accused of harassment can be devastating, but there are things you can do to minimize the impact and maybe even turn the tide. If you’re facing harassment charges, here are some simple things you can do:
- Even if you’re tempted to explain yourself or apologize, do not reach out to the other person. Continuing contact can make things worse.
- Keep records of your messages, calls, and interactions. If your texts were polite or there were no threats, this evidence can help your case.
- Do not post about the accusation or vent online. Prosecutors can use social media activity against you, even if it seems harmless.
- A harassment charge is serious, and a lawyer can help you navigate the situation before it escalates. The sooner you get legal advice, the better.
By staying proactive and seeking legal guidance, you can protect your rights and work toward the best possible outcome.
Seek Advice From an Experienced Seattle Harassment Attorney Today
Without a doubt–online dating can be messy. What might feel like persistence to one person may feel like harassment to another. If you’ve been accused, it doesn’t automatically mean you’re guilty, so if you find yourself in this situation, contact Jennifer today to schedule a consultation.